missing her

my mind wanders aimlessly
lost in a haze
of thoughts
trying to figure out
all these inebriating emotions
so unexpected
so not prepared for

lying in my big bed alone
empty now
empty and naked
like my heart and soul,
two parts of me
missing her madly….
this missing thing so insane!

the wall writings are clear
what is happening here
yet she knows i still hold back
for unknown reasons
despite not wanting to
as fear remains a
forceful enemy

as tears slide from my eyes
i hold “Rose” in my hand
to find that energy,
that strength
from this smooth little piece
of her world, like her shirt
now covering my nakedness

restless sleep finally finds me
only to wake to emptiness
once again,
reaching out to no one
craving her soft hands touching me
feeling her warm skin wrapped
in spoon-fashion behind me

counting the minutes
‘til this emptiness
will be replaced once again
by her presence in my life
hoping i, one day,
will release the fear
of love

~wicked~